I’m realizing that lately, I haven’t really been the best me
I can be. I’ve been overwhelmed by stress and anxiety and have allowed the devastating
effects to seep out into my relationships with other people (humans as Colt
would say).
I’ve been retreating into that dark place where I go to try
and escape the depressing realities of the world. I’ve been trying to hide from
the disappointments that I’m faced with each day. In doing this, I’ve allowed
my personal relationships to suffer. Without realizing it, I’ve pulled myself
away from life. In doing this, I’ve become easily agitated. I find myself being
judgmental of others (which is the exact opposite of what I strive to do). I’ve
fallen so far into this hole of despair that I’ve forgotten that I’m not the
only person in the world dealing with life.
To those of you that have been directly affected by my
craziness, I apologize. I’m truly sorry for any hurt, disgust, or extra stress
I’ve added to your life. This is the exact opposite of the type of person I
strive to be in life. I’m constantly pushing for kindness, compassion,
understanding and love for everyone. Yet, here I am worrying about Me Me Me. So
ridiculous.
Instead of focusing on everything that’s going wrong, or not
the way I think it should, I WILL start focusing on the good in life. I have an
amazingly kind, compassionate and intelligent son. This child loves me no
matter what. He is always there by my side to remind me of the most epic thing
I’ve done in my life. I have a family, a wonderfully and amazingly crazy
family. No matter how ridiculous things get for any of us, I know that they
will always be there to offer a shoulder to lean on, a hand getting up, or just
a session of drunken karaoke. I have friends, great friends that I may not see
often, but will always be there to shake some sense into me or to just
listen. I have a job; I have my health,
and most of all… I have God – God who will never forsake me and will always,
ALWAYS make sure that I’m taken care of.
I guess the lesson here is STOP to START!
Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Stop allowing yourself to
get wrapped up in all that is wrong with life and START focusing on all that is
right. Stop running away from the people that care most for you and START
mending relationships and taking the first step to enjoy life with each other.
Stop waiting for people to come to you so that you feel better, start going to
them. Stop getting through life and start enjoying life. No matter where you
are in your life right now, there are plenty of things to enjoy, so start
enjoying!
Much love!
#KindnessAlways
